After I grew used to you, you decided to leave.
You accompanied so many persons for 19 years and many months. One of our dogs gave birth to you, and we gave you to a very special human being. After being in that family’s heart, you chose to be with another as a companion. Many years later, you came back to us when he needed to immigrate. The circle closed on your return, and you even traveled from one country to another, to remain at our side.
We always say that dogs help us and we take care of them. They are joy, warmth, and a smile when we are unwell. A possibility to reverse sadness and pain.
Even days after your passing, my little one, I feel my selfish sadness arise, still as painful.
My tears flow remembering you and thinking that you are not here. I also see your last days, hours and minutes, and I know that you hung on, even then, to accompany me.
I understand so much since your passing.
The answer to our search is in each relationship
Human beings live searching for truth, searching to be, searching for freedom and that dream of substantial union with the Divine. And it turns out that what one is seeking is in each relationship that one has.
And I dare to say that with you I could connect to so many things at the moment of your physical passing.
It was an almost magical understanding in the midst of the pain. I lived memories that made me understand that everything that I needed at each moment appeared, even though I didn´t understand that.
I saw your life in retrospective. I saw the union with so many persons that you were with, and how you touched each one with an experience of love.
You were the cure for me during a time of anguish and uncertainty. You were a companion who sustained and took care of me. When nights became difficult due to fears and anxiety, you were there, almost without touching me. When my anguish was more apparent, I only perceived you, and for me you were a refuge. It was you who transmuted everything in that moment into safety and calm for my mind. You were the guardian of my dreams.
Unconditional love
I was always grateful. But today, looking back, I realize the magnitude of your love.
Humans have the joy of connecting with many, and I had that joy with you.
As many others did.
How tremendous it is to realize so many things that today are a teaching of love.
To be present without waiting, to accompany even though no one tells you to nor values it, because we connect from another vibration.
I can believe that you waited for tenderness and it turned out to be the opposite. You gave it to me without my valuing it. This doesn´t matter because, all the same, without my realizing it, I felt it. It was the vibration of love, not of understanding.
Love is perceived as a physical sensation, but you enabled that love to accompany me without making a physical move, simply by being attentive, without rushing, without a response, only by helping me to change my vibration just by being present.
There are special relationships
Relationships with our pets are not something appended to our lives. They are another kind of relationship and understanding.
Just like our relationship with everything that surrounds us.
Nearing the end, we began to take care of you and to be more watchful of your needs. And even with all your limitations, you approached me and searched for me. I believed, and I will believe, that this was to feel me close. Maybe I am mistaken, but today I see that this was so that I could feel you and today I suffer less.
Many times, I asked myself what caused you to live with so many limitations—without hearing and seeing and almost bent over.
I believe that seeing you like this every day was a teaching. I learned to communicate by approaching you to touch you, without making you jump up. I learned to be attentive to your needs.
I began to put diapers on you because you instinctively lost your memory, and I, my patience, but I sought to understand.
I often complained. Cleaning and bending over more often to take you from one place to another was becoming a difficult and tedious task. Waking early so that you could go out, even though you were wearing a diaper. This often wore me out and put me in a bad mood. How difficult it was to not understand.
And almost without wanting to, I was gradually understanding that you were continuing to teach me how to love.
To wait on, assist and accompany is what we lack as beings living in relationship. Developing empathy and understanding is not something natural for human beings. This is only a virtue in dogs and pets. We beings live reality from our own “I”, and from what we possess. We learn to give of ourselves at times or with very specific persons.
Awakening empathy is something that one must transcend by leaving the I and seeing the other. And this understanding passes through the sieve of what is reasonable, and from there, there is no path. Not everything needs to be reasoned or explained. Our pets only give and are.
Today I am learning and understanding many unimaginable things, within days of your passing.
The most intense thing is that I believe that on the final days, when you barely ate or drank, we accompanied you. And today I believe that you were getting us used to your passing. You left us time to say goodbye to you.
The easy roads are not better; there is no quality or worth.
I could have chosen for them to put you to sleep, but something made me think that it wasn´t necessary. It was better to live this slow, agonizing experience in order to continue accompanying and learning.
Accompanying you made me think about the human beings I share with.
We need to learn from that relationship to do the same.
Living in the present.
I believe that valuing each instant with each thing that surrounds us is one of aspects that we must pay greater attention to.
I learned how to perceive with you; something which I must still learn to apply. Being is this: living the moment, sharing, being there and nothing else.
The quality of each moment is like the spectacle of seeing a dawn or a sunset.
A perfect picture with a sensation of indescribable pleasure, a rapture, just feeling and being.
Thank you for all that was lived, and I am still continuing to understand.
My little life teacher.🐾🤍
